Ballroom Dance

J M (Mike) Nelson
Email:jmnelson@cloudnet.com
Phone: 612-810-0157

Make ‘Em Giggle

First let me put “giggling” in a positive perspective, e.g. a light, perhaps slightly disconcerting laugh associated with the thrill of learning something new, desirable, and more intriguing than expected. Most women seem to giggle freely. Guys more often stifle it, and they might even deny it, but, inside, they know that they do it.

Giggling is often evidence that someone’s life has been enhanced, so when dance partners giggle a bit, I feel rewarded and complimented, and, perhaps best of all, complemented. I didn’t set out to precipitate giggling, but when it began happening often enough for me to notice, and assured that they weren't laughing at me, I began looking for the precipitating factors. I found them at two levels, beginner and intermediate.

Key Factors: Frame and Cadence. Present a strong, confident, almost immobile frame. This not only projects authority, but it provides confidence; your partner is always aware of your position on the dance floor. Keep your extended arm slightly forward and predictably in place, and keep your right hand firmly on her shoulder blade. With a new partner, with appropriate music, begin a SQQ cadence on the first beat of a musical phrase, never deviate, step normally, and close on QQ so as to maintain orientation.

Beginners. If your dance partner has any dance experience and can follow the music, even if she has not partner danced before, she will likely soon pick up your cadence. Stay in closed position until she is comfortable, limit your movement to gradual turning, increasing the degree of turn in proportion to her ability to follow, and, if necessary, politely request some firmness in her extended arm. If she asks, describe your frame and cadence, but only if asked. Most of the time you need only to dance. As she becomes comfortable with your dependable lead, consistency in cadence, and confidence in navigation, consider a simple twinkle or weave, but only if she has adjusted to following the pressure associated with your lead. Often a trip around the dance floor in a closed, gradually turning, SQQ box will precipitate a smile and perhaps a giggle, for it is rare for a beginner to dance with someone with the aforementioned confidence, consistency, and willingness to accommodate her limited capabilities rather than try to show how much you know that she doesn’t.

Intermediate Level. Often the intermediate dancer has concentrated on steps so much that they are, at best, only vaguely aware of the role of frame, and often their right arm flaps like the wing of a bird rather than remains flexibly firm like the wing of an airplane. They often ignore the role of pressure from your right hand. If they seem able to stay in cadence, follow some of your leads, yet miss many from their constantly breaking frame, try bringing your extended hands inward, in front of the upper arms; this generally brings her elbow back in line, or perhaps in front, of her shoulder line. If this proves inadequate, politely request a bit more firmness, not to criticize, but as something that you need to keep you oriented. If they accommodate your needs, then you can often lead them into patterns never before experienced, and, by that experience, they begin to see that frame, lead, and follow are much more important to enjoyment than a large repertoire of “steps.”

Enjoy the giggles, and, even if they don't giggle, they will not go away feeling intimidated.